02 Sep 10 : what’s wrong with me ?

Yesterday I was hating the very idea of having to go back to school, and time just zipped past bringing the dreaded slavery ever closer.

Today I’m bored, and time has stopped.

Bored doesn’t really mean that I’m not finding what I do interesting. That’s called maths lessons.

No. I just can’t start anything cos whatever comes to mind feels far too much effort.

And when I actually make myself do something, like writing this, it feels meaningless.

If this goes on much longer I might even start not wishing school didn’t exist.

Texted Jess several times yesterday and got curt answers. Finally rang her. She’s in one of her moods and doesn’t want to know. She communicated this with three words, one of which was ‘Ted’, and hung up.

Women!

01 Sep 10 : two days of zip

I’m really bored. Can’t settle to anything. Because of what happens on Friday. Bored, yet Friday’s approaching far too fast. Why does time zip by when you really really don’t want it to?

Just looked up zip on Wiktionary. They say it’s a sound and a kind of fastener. Kinda missed the point, guys. Has two other meanings. To zip is to move very fast, and zip also means nothing.

Oh.

They’ve got the move fast one in a lower section, zip as a verb. But you guys missed the zero meaning

The new school year starts on Friday. Stupid day to start, but at least the weekend arrives soon after. Wonder what Jess is doing today? Not sure I’m in the mood for company, but it’s usually good to see her. Usually. Depends what mood we’re both in. Obviously.

I’ll ring her and find out.

31 Aug 10 : three days to hell

Three more days and then it’s the end of all life as we know it. Why does time go by so fast when you don’t want to get there? Downloaded Marina’s album yesterday and now listening to it, memories of when life was good. She helps. Not much. Just got to the song that reminds me three more days till I’m expected to be a robot.

30 Aug 10 : back down to earth

Urrrrrrgh!

Back to school on Friday.

Why Friday? Make it Monday and I’d get an extra three days before being shoved back on the assembly line.

Don’t get me wrong, I understand why I need to do school. But I don’t like it. I understand when I make myself think it through, but I don’t feel it.

Yeh, okay, there are some good teachers. Some. There’s also teachers who are in the wrong job, or think they’re better than me, or just can’t be bothered.

And we’ve got this new guy for maths. Well at least he can’t be any worse than last year. Like the someone says on Facebook: “You’re here to work.”, “Yeh and you’re here to teach, but it don’t happen do it?”. Or something like that.

Oh yeh, Leeds Fest was incredible. I will be going again, and next year Jess’ll have to come too. Some rain, and a bit windy yesterday, obviously. This is northern England in August lol. When I say ‘a bit windy’ a mean my tent blew away, but it was cheap and already fairly trashed. Particularly enjoyed Pendulum and Marina and the Diamonds, though Marina def has it on looks The way she did I am not a robot was awesome. Have to be careful how I tell Jess that.

26 Aug 10 : hygiene and stuff

There are other problems with some teachers. Like in year 7 I had a guy who was quite interesting but if you went up to ask a question at the end of the lesson he’d get far too close, and his bad breath was something else.

Okay so it’s not cool to ask questions. What do I care what you think? Some stuff is interesting (though never in Maths), and anyway if I can be bothered I want to get decent exam results so I can go on to uni and study graphic design with the experts. Quite a few subjects at my school are setted by ability, so how well you do this year affects how good a set you’re in next year, and that can affect how easy it is to try to work because in lower sets the kids tend to be lazier and misbehave more. I had to explain that to one teacher! He thought I could relax till year 10. Mind you most of the teachers think I am too relaxed already, but they’re blind.

And then in year 8 we had this guy for Maths who never looked at us so he never knew whether we understood or not. I mean, what is the point of staring out the window while you teach? Does he do that when talking in the staff room? Doubt he has any friends to talk to.

Anyway I’m off to Leeds Fest this afternoon. Jess’s parents decided she’s too young to go this year, but I think they were worried we’d only be using one tent. If I promise I promise, but they don’t know me that well.

So it’s getting packed, everything in one very large rucksack. This is my first time and I’m not just excited, I’m kinda, you know, a bit nervous. There are some other people I know going, but not many. It would have been great to have Jess with me, but there you go.

What do I need?

I’ve asked people on Facebook but not got any sensible answers yet. Dad’s given me a list he uses when going away, but he’s never camped so I’ll have to adapt it. Only four hours left to get sorted. How am I supposed to manage that?

Catch you when I get back.

25 Aug 10 : why is the answer right?

The thing is, I can usually figure out how to get the right answers. If the teacher gives me time. And doesn’t nag too much. Mind you, with some of them that’s asking a lot.

But what’s the point in getting the answer in the back of the book if you don’t know why it’s ‘right’ or why you’d ever want to solve that kind of problem?

Now if they taught you how to make the relationship with your gf better then yes, then I’d listen, and I’d understand what the point was, and I’d be able to try out what they taught me on Jess. But no, they teach us how to solve equations. When was the last time I came across an equation outside schoolwork? Never. When was the last time I came across Jess? Yesterday evening. (She doesn’t go to my school, more’s the pity, but her Mum invited me round for dinner. They called it ‘tea’ but we just drank squash).

Now if they did teach us how to chat girls up etc then I probably still wouldn’t understand WHY it worked, but at least I’d be able to EXPERIENCE it working.

18 Aug 10 : tell me why

OK. So where had I got to?

Oh yes, what’s the point of learning tables?

I sort of know them and I get by in lessons.

The real question is what’s the point of algebra?

I mean, letters standing for numbers. If I want to do puzzles I’ll buy a puzzle book, or find stuff on the net. If I want to use numbers why can’t I just use the actual numbers? What is the point of calling something x. And why x? Why not t? Or T? Why not call it Ted? In fact why not call all unknown numbers Ted and then let them keep their privacy if they want.